Major Medical Breakthrough01 Dec 2006
In a breakthrough for German medicine, researchers have revealed that cold kidneys do not cause disease. This has the potential to save millions for the German health care system, as until now it has been thought that cold kidneys are the second leading cause of death in Germany, just ahead of being exposed to drafts and behind the number one killer, a range of circulatory disorders known as Kreislaufkollaps.
Research into these conditions has been all the more difficult as they seem only to occur in Germany, and only to afflict native-born Germans. Finding cures could give hope that Germans could achieve of level of health on par with that of the rest of the world, although it would also eliminate the number one topic of conversation in the country. Discussion would then have to resort to other subjects such as other people's poor driving and the condition of the neighbors' gardens.
(A note to my British readers: cold kidney is a fictitious medical condition, and not something you eat.)